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The only other thing the bustling, beautiful and diverse metropolis that is Nashville, Tennessee that even vaguely compares to the wonder and amazement of Lions Head Village is surely the now defunct Opryland USA themepark. I recall many weekends that were spent there riding such wonders of the world as the "Rock n' Roller Coaster," the "Wabash Cannonball," and the life-changing, mind-altering experience that was the "Screamin' Delta Demon." What stands on the former site of Opryland nowadays, Opry Mills mall, is an absolute mockery of my joyous childhood stomping grounds.



Upon entering through the heavenly gateway pictured above, park-goers were treated to a plethora of entertainment possibilities, which included the "Chevorlet GEO Theatre," where one could view a musical presentation fit for only the gods, or the weary tourist or Nashville resident who happened to wander in. If one was in a more tranquil, pensive mood, one might go for a beautiful gondola ride, pondering life's mysteries and complexities while looking out towards the horizon, over the splendid industrial thoroughfare of I-40.

Seasoned Opryland visitors knew that the time to visit this place of most joy was most certainly early on Sunday morning. There were no lines at these times, and if one wanted to, one might ride the "Delta Demon" fourteen or fifteen times in a row, until one tired of the experience, or one's bolus was starting to become unsettled and agitated.

If one was more in the mood for terror, and unspeakable humanity, one might ride "CHAOS," an indoor rollercoaster that featured three dimensional images that were projected in front of the riders, and which could only be viewed with a wonderous plastic lens that was fitted to one's face. Images such as fire, shattering glass, and also of course the ride's trademark visual, massive clocks. As one roared by, or rather right through the clocks, a monstrous voice would yell out "YOUR TIME IS RUNNING OUT." Perhaps one might choose to embark on a whitewater adventure of epic, incredible proportions, and ride the "Grizzly River Rampage." The Rampage was certainly not for the faint of heart. One would emerge from this ride, as well as the "Old Mill Scream" completely drenched in the green waters that ran through these attractions, described by my friend and research colleauge Sam as "The salty tears of God himself."

Opryland of course offered rides for every age group. A small child could start out his childhood on, for example, the Tin Lizzy ride, and as the years progressed move up to, say the aformentioned Rock n' Roller Coaster, before finally progressing onwards to teenage glee with Hangman, a roller-coaster that hurdled you at a high rate of speed while keeping you suspended in a seat in the heavens.

The monstrous voice that uttered the fraze "TIME IS RUNNING OUT" not only told the story of the patrons of that ride, CHAOS, but of the park itself. Opryland closed its doors suddenly in 1998, almost without notice. Soon after, it was revealed that a shopping complex was to be built on the grounds of the former amusement park. At first some thought was given to maintaining some of the smaller rides for use either inside the complex or in the parking areas, but eventually they scrapped the entire park. Sadness.

But the story does not end there. In doing my research for this page, i happened upon an individual who provided to me on condition of anynimity some pertinent information. I was told to meet him at the Lincoln Park Zoo, in front of the monkey cage. I did as I was told, as I'd already been scouring the internet for days for Opryland info, most often with no avail. Anxious to recieve any information he could divulge, I met him at approximately 6:45 PM on a Sunday afternoon. He handed me a slip of paper, which was folded in half, and walked away. Fearing my life, I left the zoo immediately, and returned to my house before unfolding the document. What I found was startling.

This man informed me that many of the Opryland rides had been relocated, to another park, "Old Indiana Fun Park" in Thornville, Indiana. Needless to say, upon reading this I immediately burst out in tears. Finally, my prayers had been answered. Loading into the explorer, I trecked down to Thornville, expecting to be able to once again experience the joys of my childhood. Upon arriving, I discovered something that will forever be burned into my memory.

What folows is not for the faint of heart. Please turn away now if you wish. As I stepped out of my truck, I collapsed to the ground, out of sadness and rage. What I saw, well, i will not describe it to you.... Look at the pictures.











A view of the entrance to the waseland that was once Old Indiana Fun Park.

There is no need to comment on this matter any further. If you wish for more information, take the voice-guided tour.